Saturday, March 13, 2010

The Politics of Mommyhood

So I find it interesting that motherhood is a lot like politics. Well, at least when you are dealing with other people and their choices as parents. It really is a hotbed and one that can get you into that uncomfortable conversation/argument over who's choice was more right. It's really TOUGH!

I have realized lately that I tend to be a bit of a control freak. Those of you that have worked with me as an event planner have probably known this for years, and honestly, I think it's what made me good at that job. But now, as a mother, I find that it translates a little differently.

I feel that I researched many of the choices that I have made so far as a mom, very very extensively. I have read a million books, read studies, listened and asked questions of my doctors, and tend to take a very middle of the road approach on parenting. I think nowadays they call it "helicopter parenting". I choose what works best out of all of the things I have researched for our family and our lives and our child. But the weird part of being a parent is that I find that I just care so much. I care about the well being of my kid. And now I care about the well-being of other people's kids too. It makes me sad when I hear about people's children not being taken care of properly (and when I say properly I mean truly, society's definition of neglect).

With that in mind, I find it hard when people choose to make different choices for their children. But, like politics, you can't TELL someone that you think they are wrong. And truly, who is to say that they are? They feel that those choices are what is right for them, for their child and for their lives and nothing that you can say will change their mind. And on almost every level I feel that no one should try to change their minds... (I mean unless they are doing something that is quite obviously dangerous to the well being of their kid). But on one tiny level, deep down inside me, I want to tell them that they are wrong. Because that's not how I did it... and that's not how my circle of friends choose to do it... and... well... just because...

I know its obnoxious. And I know that I am being "judgy". And I know that some people might look at my choices and be like... that is WRONG, you SUCK and why did you do that???

I promise you, I know that I'm being a twit and I will never ever say anything out loud... but on some level I just want to be like... WHY, why do you choose to do that? It's just so WRONG!

But as my mom said to me yesterday - "says who?"

Well, I mean, um.

Dammit. She's totally right.

Parenthood is a hard line to walk. And one that for the most part will never have a totally "right" or "wrong" answer. And the best that I can do is continue to make my own decisions about my child and his upbringing and let everyone else do the same.

And honestly - try not to be such a judgy beeyotch. :-)


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